I guess you saw the U.S. News and World Report report that had El Paso rated as the ninth best place to live in the U.S.
I think they missed a few criteria that would make us Number 1. Like these:
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Average Drive Time to a Chico’s Tacos.
Price of Black Tar Heroin.
Beers consumed per week.
Cumbia skills of the general population.
Jolliness measured by weight.
You don’t have to cheat if the game is rigged.
Juarez has us beat by a long shot for cheap black tar heroin or “chiva” as its called there. Just sayin’.
You forgot to list us as the “Huachas Capital of the World”.